2008 Woodie Awards
COLUMN: 'Life Lessons' Learning through experience
Dan Kravitz
Issue date: 11/25/08 Section: Perspectives
There are angry people wherever you go. People waiting in line are angry. People at work are angry. There is probably someone in your own family who is always upset about something. Is it any wonder that so many people are frustrated? Whether it is the economy, their children or some perceived injustice people are ready to explode! There are healthy ways to display anger. Venting your frustrations can have a cathartic effect. What is not healthy or helpful is getting angry over little things.
We only hurt ourselves when we get mad at things beyond our control. Our face flushes and blood pressure rises. As much as we want to just tell someone off it never helps. We walk away just as angry. Whomever we were dealing with will not be happy to see our faces again anytime soon.
No one likes waiting in long lines. We want service right now, thank you very much. Customer service people are a pain. All we want is for them to do their jobs. Solve this problem. Meet my needs we say to ourselves. Unfortunately the real world does not work like this. Things take time. People have bad days. Not everyone's mood is sunny.
We get support for our anger. When a cashier's line is too long we complain to total strangers who sympathize with us. If people on the phone do not immediately fix a problem we do not give them a chance. Time to talk to a supervisor we tell them. The higher-up will inevitably apologize for their employees' behavior. Passive-aggressive behavior is often triggered from these types of situations. It is too easy to belittle others. We do not see them as human.
I am guilty of this behavior. I owe many a mea culpa to those whom I have hurt. Of course I will probably never see these people again. This does not matter. What matters is how I leave an encounter. I can walk away from a person leaving both of us in worse moods. I can end a phone conversation feeling like I want to hit my head into a wall. There has to be a better way of handling moments like these. Why must these little things be made so huge?
We only hurt ourselves when we get mad at things beyond our control. Our face flushes and blood pressure rises. As much as we want to just tell someone off it never helps. We walk away just as angry. Whomever we were dealing with will not be happy to see our faces again anytime soon.
No one likes waiting in long lines. We want service right now, thank you very much. Customer service people are a pain. All we want is for them to do their jobs. Solve this problem. Meet my needs we say to ourselves. Unfortunately the real world does not work like this. Things take time. People have bad days. Not everyone's mood is sunny.
We get support for our anger. When a cashier's line is too long we complain to total strangers who sympathize with us. If people on the phone do not immediately fix a problem we do not give them a chance. Time to talk to a supervisor we tell them. The higher-up will inevitably apologize for their employees' behavior. Passive-aggressive behavior is often triggered from these types of situations. It is too easy to belittle others. We do not see them as human.
I am guilty of this behavior. I owe many a mea culpa to those whom I have hurt. Of course I will probably never see these people again. This does not matter. What matters is how I leave an encounter. I can walk away from a person leaving both of us in worse moods. I can end a phone conversation feeling like I want to hit my head into a wall. There has to be a better way of handling moments like these. Why must these little things be made so huge?
Viewing Comments 1 - 1 of 1
zarkmud
posted 11/25/08 @ 5:37 PM EST
It's comments like this that make me mad as hell.
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